mommy 'hood: Are you there, Lord, it's me, MAK...

I know You are.

I came upon a photo I used to surprise hubby with the news I was with child. It was a random photo of a baby I thought was cute. I pulled it off the internet. Just a cute little photo of a child captured as he slumbered.

I created a screensaver for the computer so he'd see it as soon as he sat down at his desk. Nothing extravagant, just a simple "Congrats, you're going to be a daddy!" and the picture.

I surprised him. It was sweet. He loved it.

Unfortunately, not too long afterward, I lost the baby. After so much time and effort, I'd lost our child, and hope, at the same time.

Then, a few short months later, I found out I was pregnant again. No surprise for daddy this time, just a quick fearful tap on his shoulder as I showed him the positive pregnancy test. Fearful because I didn't know what to expect. It was so soon. Would this time be different? We accepted the news and waited, hopeful.

Nine months later we welcomed our little miracle into the world and thanked You for the beautiful blessing you bestowed upon us.

I knew You had answered my prayer for a child. We wanted a baby and You gave us one.

I didn't understand then that You had given me the baby I prayed for.

Just yesterday I was going through all of the photos we've taken of the little guy. I want to use some for a book I'm writing for him. It's a children's book about how he was born, and I needed pictures from my pregnancy too. That picture I used for my husband's surprise was in with some of my pregnancy shots, right next to a photo of my new baby boy.

That's when I knew You answered my prayer.

Not a prayer.

My prayer.